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Tag Archives: asking for help

The Magic of the Do-Over

Posted on March 12, 2013 by Fern Weis

 

I bet you’ve always thought do-overs are for kids and games.  Think again.  Do-overs apply to most situations and people, although we really focus here on your relationship with your child.

Do you wish you had handled a situation differently with your teen? You never know what will fly out of your mouth when they give you attitude, rebellion or indifference… or when you are tired or worried.  Who you are in the heat of the moment is not who you are an hour or a day later. I admit, I’ve been known to scream from frustration.  I’m needing to be right, or just don’t feel heard.  Ditto for my kid, right?

It takes a little courage (which means leaving your ego in another room) to come back, after the fact, and bring up the topic again.  You won’t regret it – promise.  What’s on the other side of your fear is resolution and understanding.  So take that leap. Tell your teen you had some time to think about what happened and what was said.

–  “What I really wanted to say… “
–  “I’ve been thinking about what happened and I’d like to talk to you again, without arguing  or yelling.
–  “I’m calmer now, and I do want to hear what you have to say.”

You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.  The added benefit is that you are showing your kids how people reconcile, discuss their differences and show humility. That sounds like a win-win to me.

Start taking advantage of your ‘do-over’ opportunities.  And share this message with friends and family. You never know who needs to hear just this message, today.  I love to hear from you, so leave a comment, share an experience, and let us know how these strategies work for you.

 

Posted in communication, experiential learning, leadership, life skills, parenting, siblings, teens | Tags: asking for help, communication, courage, leadership, parenting, teens, tweens, values | 4 Comments |
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